Student Profiles & Tips for Avoiding the Flu

Hello all you avid readers! Just so ya'll know, Theo (mainly Theo), AJ, and I are determined to make Mrs. Bowerman shed real, legit tears. Theo hates me right now (not really). Direct quote from Nick: "Where my cup?!", spoken in a slightly high pitched tone indicating genuine surprise. Mitchell is snacking on a blue balloon (how unsanitary). Sarah is wearing a shirt in a lovely shade of pink; it matches the chair in which my other best friend, Theo sits. I don't think that sentence was balanced. Oh well... who cares? I do, actually. Haha.

Here goes my well-thought-out profiles of the selected persons in Mrs. Bowerman's math class. (I will only state nice things as I don't want to be expelled)

Theo: White-Ivory-Purple (how unfortunate); awesome writer; pretty hair; nice shoe style; exotic eyes; keen sense of smell (just kidding, but it sounded good) and wordage; exemplary soul; attached earlobes; rather developed hypo-space; (usually) uses psychiatric terms in correct way

AJ: White (with pink undertones): divine theatre skills; good singer (pronounce the "g" as in goat); wearing good tights; dirty mind; good ankles; nice (on the outside); plays farmville; phenomenal

Sarah: ASIAN!! (shabooyah); short; cute; funny; innocent; silly; blunt; funny; tries to be nice; laughs funnily; always returns my "hi(s)"; can make me laugh (unless I'm mad); beautiful in every single way

Toby: White (in a creepy way); annoyingly honest; nice eyeballs; nice smile (unless it's devious); does not reek of BO; funny face; curious mind...

Mitchell: Pinkish white; enjoys chewing inanimate objects (namely balloons); good card shuffler; plays guitar; straightens his hair; uses conditioner (yay); likes my best friend (possibly); has blushed cheeks

Pooja: Brown; nice; kind (totally different than nice); unique; smart; funny; rather small hypo-space; funny laugh; pretty shade of hair colour; good student and writer; wears shiny hair clips

Nick: Softly pinkish white; nice; has iphone; has good intentions (most of the time); tries really hard in French class; occasionally makes me smile

Mrs. Bowerman: White; all knowing; beautiful; everlasting; fun; fourth dimensional; the best person ever; Canadian; good political views; has three super awesome, fun, lovely children; this list goes on for eternity porque she has an infinite amount of awesomeness

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Things you can do that may or may not lower your chances of getting H1N1 (more commonly known as Swine Flu):

-Wash your hands

-Refrain from touching anyone or anything

-Use hand sanitizer located at many convenient places

-Die before you catch the virus

-Get your flu shot

-lock yourself in a closet stocked with food for 10 years

-Wear those masks like the Asians do

-After witnessing a violent sneeze sing Row, Row, Row Your Boat two times as you circle the person closest to you